An Open Letter To Phylicia Rashad

Did you ever hear the expression, ‘Sometimes it’s best to say nothing’? I wish you had because maybe then you would have kept quiet, rather than coming out in support of ALLEGED serial rapist Bill Cosby.

Sure, you can support your friend; you can say you are shocked to hear these stories; you can say this doesn’t sound like the man you know. But what you cannot, and should not, say is that this never happened, and especially not for the ludicrous reasons you give.

You said, and I’ll quote:

“What you’re seeing is the destruction of a legacy. And I think it’s orchestrated. I don’t know why or who’s doing it, but it’s the legacy. And it’s a legacy that is so important to the culture.”

So, you’re just gonna toss out a conspiracy theory with absolutely nothing to back it up? Not so bright, Phylicia. And why, why, would nearly thirty women, over the course of forty-some-odd years, who don’t know one another, suddenly gather now to destroy the legacy of a TV star? What do they gain by that?

Nothing; nothing except having their voices heard, their accusations levied.

You said all of this is being done to keep him off television — Cosby had a new TV deal in the works before these dozens of women came forward which has since been canceled — but if that’s the story, then why didn’t these women come forward back in his 1980s heyday with their ‘lies’? Why now, is what I’m asking? Why would a woman say that Cosby raped her in the 70s … in the 80s … in the 90s … wait twenty, thirty, forty years to come forward? What do they have to gain?

Nothing; nothing except having their voices heard, their accusations levied.

And I am not saying he’s guilty, though I am saying that once nearly thirty women come forward with nearly identical tales of being drugged and raped by Bill Cosby, his innocence seems slightly tarnished; I do believe in innocent until proven guilty but since he’ll never have to face his accusers, and since he refuses to even speak about it, do we just look the other way and pretend these women don’t exist?

But you don’t stop there, with talk of legacies and conspiracies, you take the ridiculousness up a notch by claiming that, while working with Cosby, you never saw any sign of this type of behavior from him. Well, Phylicia, did you expect? Do you think he would have brought these women onto the set of The Cosby Show and drugged and raped them in front of everyone? Rapists hide; rapists lie; rapists deceive. They don’t declare to their co-workers that they spent the weekend trying to drug Beverly Johnson so they could forcibly rape her.

And then you appeared on Good Morning America and continued to put your foot in your mouth. You said Bill Cosby could not do those things because he’s an intellectual.

So, smart men don’t rape?

You said he couldn’t do it because he’s generous.

So, men who give of their time and money cannot force themselves on women?

I understand you are trying to stand up for your friend, but you need to realize your arguments are lame. No one is trying to tarnish his legacy; not one woman said, back in the 70s, Hmmm, I’ll wait until 2014 and then I’ll say Cosby raped me just so they could ruin his reputation. That’s ridiculous.

Also ridiculous is the way you oh so subtly blame the victims — I’m not talking about your “Forget those women” comment … I’ll get to that in a minute — and yet simply ignore the fact that there must be some shred of truth when thirty women step forward and tell the same story of how they met Cosby, what he said to them, where he took them, what he did to them, and what he said to them after.

Thirty women cannot be wrong; not all of them.

Now, I’ll back you up on this, because, in your statement, you said, and again I quote in full, about Beverly Johnson and Janice Dickinson specifically:

“Forget these women. What you’re seeing is the destruction of a legacy. And I think it’s orchestrated. I don’t know why or who’s doing it, but it’s the legacy. And it’s a legacy that is so important to the culture.”

You didn’t mean to literally forget them, you meant to take them out of the equation so you could show off your conspiracy theory about a shadowy someone trying to ruin Cosby’s legacy. But you are being rude, and shaming, to these women when you say Bill Cosby couldn’t have done these things because he’s smart, philanthropic and never did it in front of you.

Stand up for your friend, if you will, but bear in mind there has to be a grain of truth, or perhaps an entire sand dune of truth, in the stories. Stand up for your friend, but take a minute to stop and think about why, why, these women would do this now, and why, why, Bill Cosby won’t answer his accusers. Stand up for your friend, but realize that when you do, you are also saying that these thirty women ... and counting ... are all liars.

Then take a seat.

I Ain't One To Gossip But ...

Sad to report that Food Network Diva — and I don’t mean Bobby Flay, though he’d fit the title, too — Giada de Laurentiis and her husband of eleven years Todd have decided to end their marriage.

And fast; in Giada’s initial statement, she said she and Todd were separating, but a day later Todd dropped the D-word when he showed up at the courthouse bright and early to file divorce papers. Then Giada put away her Crock Pot and sped down to the courts, too, to file her own papers.

Doesn’t sound like it’s gonna be amicable …. Fingers crossed.

Giada and Todd’s marriage has weathered a lot of trouble, from their busy work schedules — though I don’t know what he does, but she cooks … a lot — and rumors of her being a big old cheater. Like the rumor that she banged perennial STD John Mayer, which no doubt might be a reason Todd raced to file papers; he had to get to the Free Clinic.

Rumor has it Giada met Mayer at a charity event hosted by that other serial cheater, Tiger Woods, in 2007, and then waited two years to get Mayer into the sack; or something.

An eyewitness tells of the time Giada and John “crossed paths” at the Boom Boom Room at The Standard hotel:

“Almost as soon as they saw each other, they left the room moments apart. Giada was leaning with her back against the wall, and John was right up against her. Giada was holding his hand and she just had a huge grin on her face. John had one hand on the small of her back. They looked like two people who were going to go home together.”

Well, they didn’t go home together — she has a husband and child at home — but they ALLEGEDLY went to another hotel together.

Another eyewitness ALLEGEDLY saw the two-some not long after at the Plunge Lounge atop the Hotel Gansevoort, where they were “extremely touchy-feely” before disappearing downstairs, where Mayer ALLEGEDLY ordered up ice buckets and towels at 1:30 AM. Giada left the hotel at 3 AM.

For her part, Giada says of Mayer:  “I’ve met him and he’s a great guy, but I just like his music.”

Likes his music? Now we know she’s lying. But this is no lie: the night before Giada announced her split, she was out drinking with her BFF Bobby Flay at Cecconi’s in Miami Beach, where they drank and laughed and giggled and looked like they didn’t have a care in the world; or like one of them wasn’t going to announce the end of a marriage a few hours later.

Now, Flay is married to actress Stephanie March but it’s long been rumored that he’ll bang just about anything … January Jones.

Just sayin’.

Found in the Bullshittery File: Just after Christmas, Kim Kardastrophe went to TMZ to talk about she wanted to get pregnant — figuring then Kanye would have to spend more than thirty minutes a month by her side — but that she couldn’t fly as much because her doctors want her to reduce the stress in her life if she wants to get pregnant again.

At first that just sounded like an excuse as to why she and her husband spend so little time together — apparently his doctor told him not to fly because then he’d have to visit his wife — and because Kim spent the fall jetting around the world pushing a fragrance or an outfit or her ass or that sex tape. And it also appears to be a full-blown lie because just this week Kim was at LAX leaving the country with Kanye, but without her baby.

Like I said, Bullshittery.

Okay we all know that Halle Berry’s husband, Olivier Martinez, loves to punch people. I mean, he beat up Halle’s ex-Baby Daddy Gabriel Aubry in 2012 if you remember, and assaulted a paparazzo at LAX in April 2013, and is now punching just about anyone.

One night while arriving at LAX, Halle was carrying baby Maceo in one arm and holding Nahla’s hand. Olivier walked ahead of them carrying the baby carrier, using it as some kind of shield to keep people away.

Well, one guy seemingly got too close and Olivier used the carrier to shove him back, causing the man to fall. The good news is that it wasn’t a paparazzo, but the bad news is that it was just an LAX employee and now Olivier is being investigated for battery.

Olivier might check into some anger management courses, because he’s rapidly becoming the French Kanye West.

High school girls and Frenemies for Life, Taylor Swift and Katy Perry are still feuding over ex-boyfriends and back-up dancers I guess.

Katy ALLEGEDLY tried to ‘sabotage’ Taylor’s last stadium tour, leading Taylor to ALLEGEDLY write ‘Bad Blood’ about Katy, which led to Katy calling Taylor a “Regina George in sheep’s clothing” on Twitter and on and on and yawn.

But Katy’s done with the stupid games, and plans on bringing out the big guns—and I don’t mean her augmented boobs. She plans to “get back” at Taylor during her performance on the Super Bowl halftime show by making it the best show ever!

Oooh, that’ll show TayTay.

A source — and it can’t be Lohan because she’s still “sick” on vacation — says:

“She wants to make a statement with her performance and show that she is the biggest female act in the world and she wants to show that to everyone including Taylor, who she has a feud with. In Katy’s eyes, no one can compete on her level. [She] will be doing something on stage during her performance that will be directed towards Taylor. She is working on it to be a visual or a lyric related jab.”

Maybe she’ll just ask the other cheerleaders to spell out We Hate Taylor while creating a giant pyramid.

Grow up girls, or else take it to the streets where this dog fight belongs.

Speaking of Swifty, she’s been boyfriend-less for a hot minute now and her well of Poor Me I Got Dumped songs must be running dry so she’s set her sights on another prize: Leonardo DiCaprio.

Now, while Leo is more content to bang models by the truck-load, Taylor seems to think that because she sang a song at the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show one time that makes her close enough to be a model, and just ripe for Leo’s, er, plucking.

After which, she’ll dump him and write a new song, for which I have a title suggestion:

♫ ♪ He Said He Was a Leo, But He Was Just A Liar ♪ ♫

I smell Grammy!

When is Bill Cosby just gonna take a seat?

While performing in London, Ontario recently — one of the few venues that haven’t canceled his appearance in lieu of the dozens of rape allegations against him — a woman got up from her front row seat and walked past the stage when she was asked by Cosby where she was going.

She said she was going to the lobby to grab a drink to which Cosby responded: "You have to be careful about drinking around me."

Cuz rape jokes are fun … apparently … because the audience clapped like trained seals. But later, when a man later yelled at Cosby that he was a rapist, the man was removed from the theater.

Rule to remember: only Bill Cosby can make jokes about Bill Cosby being a serial rapist.

I’m.Devastated.

Apparently the bloom is off the rose for "Bachelorette" stars Andi Dorfman and Josh Murray, who, through a representative, issued a statement saying they’ve called off their engagement.

What kind of world has this become where a woman can’t go on a TV show, meet 26 guys, date thirteen, make out with six, get down and dirty with three, declare her undying love for two, pick one, get married and live happily ever after?

Oh.The.Humanity.

Sidenote: that Josh Murray is kinda hot. If he needs someone to hold him while he grieves the loss of his TV relationship, I'm available.

I Ain't One To Gossip But ....

It looks like uber rich David Geffen is having boy drama again.

It seems that the 71-year-old Geffen’s 20-year-old ex-boyfriend — who was kicked off his college football team for making out with his wealthy daddy in the press box during a game … he initially told school officials Geffen was his grandfather but that didn’t explain the lip-lock — was arrested last October for violating the terms of a restraining order.

Jamie Kuntz is accused "of following, harassing and making a 'credible threat' against Geffen sometime between September and November, and he is now facing a felony stalking charge and a minor misdemeanor charge for allegedly disobeying a court order to stay away from his former lover.

I bet David Geffen wishes he could go back to the good old days when the only gossip about him was that he’d married Keanu Reeves.

Oh, and by the way, the only time 20 goes into 71 is when there’s a money exchange involved. Just sayin’.

Gosh, I loathe Gwyneth Paltrow. And the fact that she name-drops her own mother to her own soon-to-be-or-not husband makes me loathe her all the more.

It seems Goop was hanging out in the Hamptons with her consciously-uncoupled-towel-boy-slash-singer-slash-sometimes-husband at a spa, where said ex, AKA Chris Martin was paying for a one-hour massage.

Naturally, bored by her pedestrian husband, Gwyneth busied herself with texts and phone calls while he mopped the sweat from her forehead. But, when he asked to whom she was speaking — he’s English, that’s how they talk ... "to whom" — Goop said, and this is where I die:

“Blythe Danner“. Her.Mother.

I guess ‘Mom’ or ‘Mother’ is just too common for Paltrow. I also guess that on the other end of that phone call, Blythe Danner was mouthing the words: How did this bitch get my new number? to the help.

So many women — twenty eight at last count — have come forward with strikingly similar stories of being drugged and raped by Bill Cosby that most people believe he has a standard M.O. and is a sexual predator. So what does Cosby do? Well, he urged the “black” media to stay neutral, i.e. don’t ever mention it; he sat back while his wife sang his praises as a victim, and now this …

Cosby has hired an entire fleet of private investigators to dig up information on the women who are coming forward because, god forbid, if a woman who says Cosby drugged her and raped her and then sent her on her way, well, then she deserves to have the whole world know she has unpaid parking tickets, or didn’t clean her apartment before she moved, or drinks, or swears or had had multiple sex partners.

See, any woman who would do all that — and I mean twenty eight women who would do all that — would obviously also lie about being raped by the Jell-O pudding man.

Way to shame and blame the victims, Mr. Cosby, rather than stand up and fight. Or is that because they’re all telling the truth?

God Madge, please sit down. After several songs were leaked from her upcoming album, Madonna claimed she was the victim of a terrorist attack not unlike, I imagine, the families of those killed on 9/11’s terrorist attack, now she’s taken to comparing it to being raped.

Drama.Queen.

But, to me, what she’s most upset about is that, after the songs were leaked, she and her team decided to release six tracks for that upcoming album and every single one of them has bombed … not unlike a terrorist attack. The songs barely made an impact; in fact, there was a “nosedive” in sales after the first week, which saw her in lucky number 13. Now her single with Nicki Minaj, “Unapologetic Bitch” is down to #188, while “Living for Love” is #529.

In addition to all of that, one of the songs — “Two Steps Behind” — is allegedly about Lady Gaga whose own albums are still out-selling Madge’s Rebel Heart.

Poor Madge, being out-sold by her rival and Taylor Swift, a girl young enough to be her, well, almost granddaughter.

Back in September, Jeremy Renner is divorcing his wife of ten months — and mother of his daughter — Sonni Pacheco.

Didn’t know he was married? Probably because he kept it a secret until last September. But now it’s about to get ugly up in there, with all kinds of speculation that Jeremy married Sonni to help her stay in America, or that she was just the surrogate baby mama to Jeremy and his business partner boyfriend.

Sonni Pacheco is seeking the split over irreconcilable differences and … get this … she says he stole her passport, birth certificate and Social Security card. Pacheco says they have a prenup, but adds that it should be torn up because it was based on fraud.

No further detail about what she means by “fraud” but the last time I heard “fraud” used in a divorce proceeding was when Zellweger was seeking an annulment of her four month-long marriage to the long-rumored-to-be-gay, Kenny Chesney. Just sayin’.

Lindsay Lohan has been infected with the Chikungunya virus while on vacation in French Polynesia — give her a break, she worked steadily for about eight weeks this year so she deserves a little time off — but says she will not let it ruin her vacation.

In unrelated news ... giggle ... every single pharmacy in French Polynesia is completely out of pain meds.

Coinky-dink? I think not.

I love Christina Aguilera but, gurl, she’s a diva who can make Mimi look positively sweet.

A couple of weeks ago Christina went to Disneyland in Anaheim to celebrate her birthday with friends and family and she went off on The Mouse.

She was ALLEGEDLY quite rude to fans that approached her asking for a photo but then the tables turned when she couldn’t get a photo with Mickey Mouse. It seems the person behind the Mouse ears was leaving the area for his break when she asked for a picture and was told she would have to wait until he came back; she went all Reese-Witherspoon-Without-The-Vodka on him, asking Don’t you know who I am??

And then she called Mickey Mouse, the symbol of the happiest place on Earth, an asshole. Mickey had to be ushered to a safe zone before he went all Gangsta Rodent on the pop tart.

Okay, so we all know Justin Bieber wouldn’t know the truth if it egged his house, right?

I mean, he once said he’d bought a yacht when all he was really doing was hanging out on some rich family’s boat; he once took a photo of a Bugatti and said it was his car when, in fact, it actually belonged to Birdman.

Now, he says he bought himself a new plane for Christmas, and proudly Social-Media’d — Yes, it’s a verb — pictures all over; he captioned the picture: “New jet for Christmas, and she’s beautiful.”

Trouble is that the G4 on which he posed is for sale, but Bieber never bought it. It was just another lie, like the lie that he’s got talent for anything more than being a douche.

Sunday Funnies

Sunday Funnies