Guns Are His Right ... And He Used His Right To Kill His Wife

Martin Gaytan, a 24-year-old Texas gun enthusiast — Enthusiast? In my house we just call ‘em ‘gun nuts’—has been charged with murder after he allegedly shot and killed his wife, Monica, during an argument over the weekend.

Gaytan has always said he believed the right to bear arms was necessary for “protection” from foreign and domestic governments, for home defense, to fight off “muggers and rapists,” and because “it’s my right,” but over the weekend, during a fight with his wife, he took the gun from her hands — she must also be an “enthusiast” — and shot her several times.

He calls it self-defense, although if he’d taken the gun from her … ?

The Gaytans had been married for a year and had a five-year-old child.

That’s all … except, well, guns don’t kill people, but gun nuts who think they know how to handle a gun and then whip it out during an argument, using it to shoot the mother of their child several times, kill people.

Just sayin.’

source

Random Musings

Since becoming husband-and-husband, I’ve found renewed joy in my life with Carlos because, well, I get to gaslight him all the time now!

Like the day I was home and he called to say he was running late, and I acted as though I couldn’t hear him.

Then, when he got home, and I asked why he was late and hadn’t called, he said he had. I said he didn’t; he said he did. It went on like that for a couple of m minutes before he whipped out his phone and called the house phone because he wanted to check if it was working.

And I laughed, telling him that I was gas-lighting him.

Like the time he said he had to go to Lancaster for work, then to Cassatt, and then back to Camden. He called to tell me he was back in Camden and I asked what he meant by that.

Carlos: I told you I was going to Lancaster.

Bob: No, you didn’t.

Carlos: Yes, I did.

Bob: No, you said you were going to Cassatt and then back home.

Carlos: I did go to Cassatt.

Bob: You went to Cassatt? Why didn’t you tell me?

Gaslight. Not that there’s a huge sum of money I’ll come into when I have Carlos declared mentally unstable; I’m just doing it for fun.

"I, Darren Wilson, hereby resign my commission as a police officer with the City of Ferguson effective immediately. I have been told that my continued employment may put the residents and police officers of the City of Ferguson at risk, which is a circumstance that I cannot allow. For obvious reasons, I wanted to wait until the grand jury made their decision before I officially made my decision to resign. It was my hope to continue in police work, but the safety of other police officers and the community are of paramount importance to me. It is my hope that my resignation will allow the community to heal. I would like to thank all of my supporters and fellow officers throughout this process."

Good.Bye. And I hope we never hear from you again.

Tony Dungy, the former NFL coach-turned-NBC analyst who said he wouldn't have drafted Michael Sam because he wouldn't want to "deal with all of it" — meaning the media attention — said this week that he would welcome wife-beater Ray Rice onto a team.

So, you can beat up a woman and still be an NFL star but you can’t be gay.

South Carolina Attorney General Alan Wilson yesterday petitioned the Fourth Circuit Court, asking that they not rule on his marriage appeal until the Supreme Court issues on a decision on the cases out of Sixth Circuit. Wilson, like his counterparts in several other states, is desperately trying to keep his case alive so that marriage equality can be undone should SCOTUS rule negatively.

Although he’s wasting taxpayer money and doesn’t seem to realize that South Carolina is not bound by decisions of the Sixth Circuit Court.

Seriously, Alan, give up. The Queers have landed legally married in South Carolina!

Back in the olden days — well, late last century — it was always a bit surprising to see interracial couples on scripted TV shows. Not surprising to see them in real life, mind you, but TV always seems to lag behind the real word. I still remember the shock of the Willis’ on The Jefferson’s back in the day.

So, imagine my surprise when two new shows — NBC’s Marry Me and Bravo’s first scripted show The Girlfriend’s Guide to Divorce — each featured an interracial couple.

And a gay one, to boot — clockwise from top left: Dan Bucatinsky and Tim Meadows from Marry Me, and Patrick Heusinger and J. August Richards from GG2D.

A friend posted this thing on Facebook that you should Google your first name and the word ‘meme’ following. Then go to images and post the first image that comes up.

That one, up there, was the first image that came up, but that — down there — was Number Four and, I felt, far funnier and more apropos.

So, let me get this white: in America you can be shot to death for stealing cigarillos from a store in Missouri, and you can be choked to death for selling “loosies” — single cigarettes — on Staten Island?

Oh, only if you’re Black in America.

AT&T U-verse had a Free HBO weekend over Thanksgiving and so I recorded all the episodes of The Leftovers, which is based on a book I’d read last year about a Rapture-like disappearance of 2% of the world’s population.

Good book, but the show features one Justin Theroux, an ISBL hottie, and star of a Would You Hit It post. Justin appears shirtless, pants-less and nude.

Bob is intrigued.

Down in Houston, two teenage carjackers were met with a wee surprise when trying to steal a car: a stick shift.

The two morons held the motorist at gunpoint trying to take his car, and then demanded that he tell them how to drive it. After the driver provided a few instructions, the teens ordered him out of the vehicle, drove off, probably riding the clutch all the way, and the driver called the police.

Both morons were arrested for carjacking and stupidity.

Speaking of Texas, county clerks in Fort Worth and Houston say they won't issue marriage licenses to same-sex couples even if a federal judge lifts his stay of a ruling striking down Texas' marriage bans.

Bob says you should then be fired for not doing your jobs, and then you can whine about how, while not following the law, and denying Gays the legal right to marry, your own rights were trampled on.

Then you can STFU.

I stopped by Blobby’s Blog this week — on World AIDS Day — and he had written a post and then ended it with a Rosanne Cash song, “I Want A Cure” as a way of tribute.

And that little moment triggered the song that’s been playing on a loop in my head for the week. The song, “Tennessee Flat-Top Box” was one from Rosanne’s childhood — she remembered it being sung to her as a lullaby — and she longed to record it. When she did she found out that old lullaby had been written by her late father, Johnny Cash.

Random Musings

First off ... big shout-out to Anne Marie for her donation to The Will of the People Fund —click that lick up there on the right — a group Carlos and I helped create to fight for marriage equality in South Carolina.

Thanks Anne Marie, for the donation-slash-wedding-gift in our name.

You don't know how much we appreciate it!

So, I mentioned last week that Carlos and I ordered our wedding bands. I mentioned that Carlos had been into the “Smallville Jewelers” a couple of weeks back and how receptive they were to selling bands to a same-sex couple. I mentioned that when I looked at the rings — in silver, platinum and tungsten because I am not a golden kind of gay — I picked one that I really liked and Carlos told me he had also picked that very same ring.

Great minds, right?

Cut to the weekend and Carlos and I are in the car and he says to me, “Do you really like the rings?”

Yes.”

“We could get something else if you want …”

“Wait! You want a different ring?”

“No, I really like the ones we chose but if you want a different ring …”

“UM, why would I walk into a jewelry store, pick a ring, found out it’s the same exact mother%^$ing ring you’d pick, get our fingers sized, place the order and then decide I wanted something different?”

“I just want to make sure you like them.”

Oy.

Ann Romney, that insufferable Republican bitch, and wife to serial loser Mittsy Romney, is back in the spotlight saying her husband would have prevented the current ISIS mess … or made a fortune off of it … and then, when asked if Mittsy would run in 2016, she said, oh so sickeningly sweet, "We will see."

Let him run, and when he becomes a three-time loser maybe then this self-involved, out of touch, wannabe queen of America will shut her stinking piehole for good.

God, I loathe her.

UPDATE:

After an airman was unable to complete his reenlistment because he omitted the part of a required oath that states “so help me God,” the Air Force changed its instructions for the oath and, following a review of the policy by the Department of Defense General Counsel, the Air Force will now permit airmen to omit the phrase, should they so choose.

The change is effective immediately.

Good, since we are going back to war and will need as many military men and women as possible, eh?

Still, it was a stupid policy and it’s nice to see it ended so soon.

After arrest warrants were issued, three of the suspects involved in that mob gay bashing of a gay couple in Philadelphia turned themselves into police. They are: 

Kevin Harrigan, Kathryn Knott, and Philip Williams.

Most galling of all is that these three, and hopefully any and all others involved in the attack, will not be charged with committing a hate crime as Pennsylvania hate crimes laws don’t cover sexual orientation because, well, gay people are less than.

I’ve said it before, but it bears repeating: if you bash a couple because they are gay, that’s hate; if you bash a couple because you want their wallet, that’s hateful.

There is a difference.

Now, while I abhor violence of any kind, the more I read about what these f&kmonkeys did, and especially read Kathryn Knott’s homophobic Tweets, I wish the punishment would be that they endure the exact same public beating they gave that couple.

And then lock them up for a good long while.

New TV season Hottie Alert:

Ioan Griffudd, of ABCs Forever about an immortal man who works in a morgue and dies every episode only to be brought back to life. It’s like Sherlock Holmes, who never dies. But Ioan is adorable with a delicious accent, so we’ll stick around for a while with this one.

And Las Alonzo, from The Mysteries of Laura AKA Grace Adler is a Cop Now. The show is cute, kinda funny, kinda serious, but I fell it could be wearing thin after a few views. But Las is definite eye candy while we watch.

Color me surprised, but a group of Texas county sheriffs and law enforcement officers have filed a brief with the Fifth Circuit Court of Appeals this week in support of marriage equality.

Yes, in support of marriage equality.

The letter, filed by Harris County Sheriff Adrian Garcia, Dallas County Sheriff Lupe Valdez, and more than 50 other Texans working in law enforcement, said, in part:

 “Gay and lesbian law enforcement officers and other first responders put on their uniforms, place themselves in harm’s way to protect and defend our communities, and swear to uphold our laws without prejudice or bias. … They serve our communities with equal distinction, skill, and bravery. But Texas denies these men and women the equal dignity and respect they deserve. Texas does not treat them equally in their day-to-day work, nor, tragically, even when they make the ultimate sacrifice.”

Good on Texas and good on law enforcement.

Fun Fact: President Obama and Tea Party Senator Ted Cruz are cousins—14^th cousins to be exact.

Picture that Thanksgiving dinner!

Oy.

Just in time for our wedding, new census data released last week makes a simple, but oh so substantial change in the ways that same-sex couples will be categorized now.

We are now considered families.

In prior years, the U.S. Census Bureau counted same-sex couples as “unmarried partners” — even if they were legally married — but starting with the new annual American Community Survey, same-sex couples will be counted in the family totals.

It sounds so minor, really, but it’s a huge deal; we are no longer co-habitators or partners or buddies or friends of the same-sex with benefits … we are family.

I might break out into a little Sister Sledge!

Overheard at work:

Racist, homophobic, idiotic Republican client: “What was all that protesting about climate change in New York? That’s just stupid. I say let Mother Nature take care of it.”

Me [to myself, way under my breath because I’ve learned not to poke the racist, homophobic, idiotic Republican client]: “That’s the problem you moron, Mother Nature is doing what she does because of what we’ve done.”

Asshat.

Connie Wilson Can't Be Connie Wilson In Texas

Last year in California, Connie married Aimee, cuz it’s legal and all, you know, and good, too. And after the wedding, Connie took Aimee’s last name, Wilson, as her own; Connie and Aimee Wilson. And she changed her name to Wilson on her Social Security card, her driver’s license, and on all their financial and medical records.

Connie Wilson. Say it with me, Texas. Connie Wilson.

See, this past summer, Connie and Aimee Wilson, and their three children, moved to Houston, and since her California driver’s license was about to expire, Connie Wilson went a DPS [Department of Public Safety] office to get a Texas license. But when a DPS employee saw that Connie Wilson‘s name on her California driver’s license didn’t match the name on the birth certificate, Connie Wilson showed her marriage license … to Aimee Wilson.

Uh huh.

“Her only words to me were, ‘Is this same-[sex]?' I remember hesitating for probably 10 seconds. I didn’t know how to answer. I didn’t want to lie, but I knew I was in trouble because I wasn’t going to be able to get a license.”—Connie Wilson

So she answered truthfully, that even though it didn’t make a difference in California, she was indeed married to a woman.

The DPS worker told Connie Wilson she couldn’t get a license; she needed something else to “validate” her last name — apparently a marriage license, Social Security card, and all the other papers she had weren’t enough — and then she told Connie Wilson,  “the name doesn’t belong to me.”

Now, we all know, and Connie Wilson knows, that Texas has a state statute and a constitutional amendment that prohibits the recognition of same-sex marriages from other states, but is Connie Wilson asking them to recognize her marriage, or is she just applying for a driver’s license?

See, it doesn’t end there; because it’s Texas; Connie Wilson won’t be able to drive once her California license expires; she won’t be able to fly, either, and she won’t be able to purchase anything requiring a photo ID. Also, since she won’t have a photo ID, she and her family might not be able to close on a home they’re hoping to buy, and they may not be able to obtain disability benefits for one of their children, who has both autism and Down syndrome.

And that’s ridiculous.

To add insult to injury, the DPS employee, who turned out to be a supervisor, suggested that Connie Wilson apply for a driver’s license using her maiden name, except that she can’t do that either because she lacks the necessary documentation to do so. The supervisor then suggested she could apply for a Texas license if she obtained an order from a state court changing her name to Wilson.

Well, that’s $500 Connie Wilson would have to pay that straight couples who marry don’t need to be bothered with, and, even if she did so, there is no guarantee she would be successful because she’s changing her name to that of her, yes, same-sex spouse, and this is Texas and, well, Texas. Plus, as Connie Wilson says, her name is already federally, legally recognized as Wilson so she’s not sure a judge would see the point in granting the name change.

Connie Wilson — who says she now knows “what it feels like for a person who is undocumented” — has contacted Equality Texas, which is now working with Houston Senator Sylvia Garcia’s office on the issue.

Paul Townsend, general counsel for Garcia, is awaiting a written explanation of the agency’s position before issuing a formal response, but he does notice that the DPS website says existing Texas residents cannot use same-sex marriage licenses from others states to update their licenses, but there is no policy whatsoever regarding new Texas residents whose names have already been changed elsewhere.

Connie Wilson will not give up, though; she says she will get a valid, accurate Texas driver’s license even if it means suing the Department of Public Safety, not for money, but just for the right to have her legal name on her driver’s license.

And for all other same-sex couples — just the ones married legally in other states … for now … since Texas is just one of the states being sued to recognize same-sex marriages—to have the same rights as anyone else.

via  Texas Observer

photo credit SF Gate

Architecture Wednesday: The Green Lantern Residence

I don’t know why they call it the Green lantern House because I don’t think a superhero — from a film that bombed — has ever lived in it. I’d have called it the Earth, Wind and Fire plus Steel, Wood, Glass and Water House because that’s what it looks like to me.

Located in San Antonio, the house sits on a large corner lot of the Alamo Heights neighborhood overlooking the downtown area. The house was conceived, designed and built based upon both the architect and the client’s respect for the environment with an eye toward sustainability.

A single-story ranch house once sat on this lot until the new client came along and one goal was to reuse the original foundation of the old home — and some of the original wood — upon which to build the new house with single- and two-story public spaces.

In addition, the house incorporates systems such as photovoltaic panels, a green roof system, grey-water harvesting, and LED lighting. Passive systems such as arbors and overhangs were used to produce shading and reduce solar gain, while the entire project was sited to protect the number of existing heritage oak trees on the site.

At the entry, you step up and over the pool along the main entry bridge and then step back down again from the kitchen to the living area, though both spaces, and both floors, are open to one another. Additionally, wall-to-wall glass sliding doors open up to expand the room out into the pool and yard.

This rhythm is mirrored at the second floor as a series of folding doors in the ‘party room’ open to a large out-door terrace in the tree canopies, which again steps down to its own ‘landscape’ green roof garden with hot tub that takes in distance vistas of downtown San Antonio.

These ideas and designs not only provide elegant spaces for entertaining, but also provide a stage for discussion and promotion of the core principle of sustainability that produced it. The Green lantern House meets and exceeds local standards for green certifications; such as Energy Star – Gold, NAHB Green Building – Emerald, Build SA Green – Level 3, and LEED – Platinum.

It’s green and Earth-friendly, with wind and fire and water and glass and steel.

source

Random Musings

A few weeks back I saw a commercial for a mattress company saying you should replace your mattress every eight years or so. Carlos asked how long we’d had our mattress and I said, shocked, “I brought it with me from California …”

“How old is it?”

“Fourteen years … plus, maybe eight?”

Twenty-two years old! Oh for the love of the Baby Jeebus! So, we were out that next weekend looking for a new mattress and a new bed as well. And the first place we stopped we found one we liked; and we tried out mattresses, playing Goldilocks … This one is too hard … This one is too soft … This one is just right … and found one of those we wanted. So, we talked to a salesman and got a quote for the whole shebang.

A little high but … Then Carlos wanted to try another place … Rooms-To-Go … and though I loathe their furniture, off we went.

As we entered the store, the salesman bull chute opened and a bell rang and out came Sharon to lasso us into a sale.

“We’re just looking,” I said.

“For what?”

“Furniture.”

That stopped her, and she let us wander off with the obligatory, My name is Sharon, let me know if I can help you.

We wandered through the store looking at hideous bed after hideous bed; I rapped them each with a knuckle and called out “Plastic” to express my dismay at the particle-board furniture RTG sells. But, there at the back, was this beautiful Mission style King bed — a king bed for queens, oh the irony — and when I rapped on it with my knuckle …. Solid wood!

How in the hell did that get in this store. I looked around for Sharon, who’d been tracking us through the store like Mama Grizzly Bore™ hunting for relevance, hiding behind hideous armoires and plastic dining room tables and we talked bed. Of course she tried to get us to buy the whole set, but I shot that down … We don’t want the all-matchy room, thank you.

Next up was the mattress, so we walked the store with Sharon and tried the beds; too soft; way too soft; wait, this is good. Firm, but comfy. We both lay down on the bed and tried to out, feeling this was the one.

So, we got it; the bed and the mattress and box springs. It was to be delivered tomorrow, but Sharon said she could Express Deliver it on Monday if someone would home to accept it. Well, I’m home on Mondays so we went Express and were told to expect the bed sometime between 7AM and 10PM … seriously? The cable guy is clearer about when he’s coming.

But I was home, and the new bed arrived at 4PM, and was set up, and then given the Tuxedo seal of approval; he took one look at it, jumped up, and began rolling all over it, purring.

Tuxedo likee. Bob likee.

Carlos? Tuesday morning he said it was too hard and could we send it back.

I said, sweetly, as I do, at times, “We could … but they’ll charge for that, and then charge for a new mattress and charge for delivery and charge for being annoying.”

“It’s too hard.”

I said, sweetly gritting my teeth, “Maybe you should sleep on it more than 7 hours? I mean, we slept on lumpy, dumpy, ancient for fourteen years, Give this one more than one night …”

Oy. The bed stays.

I always thought judges were supposed to be impartial; apolitical.

Not so of Judge Sandra McLaughlin, a Kentucky judge, who belittled a man for wearing an Obama t-shirt in court. It seems the man, Darryl Broaddus, in court on drug charges, wore a shirt featuring President Barack Obama’s face. The shirt read ‘Let’s Do It Again,’ a reference to Obama’s 2012 re-election campaign and his attire didn’t suit McLaughlin who said on video that the shirt wasn’t helping Broaddus in her courtroom.

“He’s lucky to get out of here alive,” McLaughlin said; and twice she said his shirt was “not helping” his cause.

 “Did you see his t-shirt? Barack Obama, ‘Let’s Do It Again.’ That was a double whammy.”

No wonder that McLaughlin is the lowest-rated judge in Jefferson County “by a wide margin,” according to the Louisville Bar Association.

For example, last October, McLaughlin accused defendant Wesley Taylor of being “up here selling dope to little children.” That was false; he was not accused of selling drugs to anyone. And when burglary and drug defendant Ronnie Gravel appeared in court a week later, McLaughlin said: “He still needs to burglarize so he can maintain his drug habit. So everyone feels good and safe with him out in the public.”

Not only had Gravel not been convicted of either charge, the case was later dismissed.

Seriously, Kentucky, this is the best you can do?

A petition to repeal Houston's Equal Rights Ordinance [HERO] prohibiting discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender identity in employment, housing and public accommodations has failed to gather the necessary signatures to appear on November's ballot.

Bam!

The petition needed at least 17,269 valid signatures from registered Houston voters to put a repeal of the ordinance before voters in November and it fell short.

But, opponents of HERO claimed they had over 30,000 valid signatures when they submitted the petition last month, though a review showed just 16,500 were actually valid.

And so now, rather than go out and collect the right number of valid signature, opponents have vowed to take the city to court.

Howsabout just doing it right the first time? If not, then just sit down and think about working against equality.

So … three TV hotties this week:

Goran Visnjic, who plays Halle Berry’s husband on Extant … and then Sergio Harford, who plays Halle Berry’s dead boyfriend who may have gotten her pregnant in space … after he died.

Then throw in Chad Carroll of Bravo’s Million Dollar Listing Miami. Sure, he’s kind of a big galoot, but he likes taking his clothes off and getting couple’s massages with an openly gay realtor.

Hot.

Last week Facebook crashed for millions of users in the US and folks went cray cray.

And even though Facebook’s developer page immediately responded to the outage, and a #FacebookDown hashtag, people went nuts … at least in Los Angeles.

Several locals called a 9-1-1- emergency into the LA Sheriff’s Department, where Sgt. Burton Brink responded to their “emergency” of not being able to post cat pictures or tell folks what they had for lunch.

True story.

I prayed this wasn’t true but …

Mary’s Gourmet Diner in Winston-Salem, North Carolina, is offering a 15% "praying in public" discount to diners who openly pray before a meal. Owner Mary Haglund says she has been offering the rebate for four years, and it is not aligned with any singular religious affiliation, hasn't been advertised and is offered per the discretion of the waitstaff.

“[W]hen I see someone in a restaurant honoring their gratefulness at my table … it touches my heart. It’s just a moment or faithfulness about the plate of food. It’s not even a policy — it’s [something] we only do when we’re moved to do it.”—Mary Haglund

But the praying in public discount gained attention this week after a Christian radio station posted a photo of a customer's receipt to its Facebook page. After the receipt went viral on Facebook, Haglund dialed back the discount rules because, well, she isn’t quite so fond of prayers if it starts costing her money.

I decided I’d prefer a 100% discount at Mary’s Gourmet Diner and I can get it by never eating in an establishment like that.

What’s this? Target? What?

It seems that, after 2012’s year of being a gay-hating corporate giant, Target has filed an amicus brief in support of the plaintiffs in same-sex marriage lawsuits against the states of Wisconsin and Indiana.

I may have to rethink my Target boycott.

So, yesterday was the biog marriage equality court case heard by the US Court of Appeals for the Sixth Circuit, where the cases from Kentucky, Michigan, Ohio and Tennessee were heard by two judges appointed by President George W. Bush and one by President Bill Clinton.

Judge Jeffrey S. Sutton, one of the Bush appointees and a likely swing vote among the three, apparently asked why gay rights advocates wanted to use the courts to hasten an outcome they were gradually winning through elections and changes in attitude:

“I’d have thought the best way to get respect and dignity is through the democratic process.”

And here I always thought it unfair to let the majority vote on the civil rights of the minority.

What’s with these judges?