Asshats Of The Day Week Month Year Decade Century: The GOP

Remember that day back in 2001, after the attacks on the World Trade Center, when President George W. Bush stood before the nation and held up an old timey Wanted: Dead or Alive picture of Osama bin Laden and told us we’d hunt him down to the ends of the Earth and then didn’t?

The Republicans don’t remember that, either, because even after bin Laden was captured on President Obama’s watch they tried to say it was a victory for Bush.

And remember when President George W. Bush — draft-dodging George W. Bush — flew a fighter plane onto the deck of an aircraft carrier at sea in 2003 and proclaimed the war in Iraq was over even though the fighting went on and on for years and years after?

The Republicans don’t remember either, and now, with a new crisis in the Middle East their laying the blame for all that at the feet of Obama.

But what galls me most about this group of whiners and do-nothings and asshats is that now, after how many months of their phony Benghazi hearings and months of their fake Benghazi theories and scandals — created only in an attempt to make the President look bad — how is that now, under Obama’s watch, again, when the senior leader of the Benghazi terror branch, Ahmed Abu Khattala, was captured, the GOP only whines about how long it took, how it seems a little too convenient, and how it’s just a ruse, a distraction, to take our minds off all those other scandals that the GOP rails about instead of doing the jobs for which they were elected.

Remember when the Republicans criticized President Obama as being weak on radical Islamic extremists for his “failure” to apprehend the suspects in the embassy attack? Remember when then-presidential failure Mittsy Romney said Obama was weak on terrorism?

Well, they don’t remember that either, because now, in the manner of Mittsy that will forever be known as The Flip-Flop, the GOP doesn’t think that the capture of  Khattala should detract us, and by us I mean them, the GOP, from their now nearly six-year struggle to bring down the President.

See, now the GOP, and its lapdog FoxNews, is saying that the capture of this terrorist was orchestrated simply to take our minds off the IRS mess … or Hillary running for president … or because Obama wants to boost his approval ratings.

Seriously, GOP?

Fox News has a theory that the capture occurred because Hillary Clinton, former Secretary of State and perhaps the next President of the United States, is on a book tour. Yes, Fox News said this was done to make Hillary look good; on their program ‘Outnumbered’ the host said:

“You have a former Secretary of State who is in the middle of a high profile book tour, I think this is convenient for her to shift the talking points to some of the things she has been discussing.”

Yup, we captured a terrorist to get Hillary’s book to the top spot on a Best Sellers List.

Even has-been Eric Cantor, just before the door hit him where the Good lord split him, released a statement through his spokesman saying:

“While it’s great to see they caught the Benghazi suspect, it’s important to remember, he wasn’t really hiding.”

Seriously GOP? But they must be serious because the rest of the party took to Twitter to test their theories as to why Obama let this terrorist roam the world before capturing him at this most opportune moment, Chief wingnut in the asshat parade, Allen West, a Teabagger who can’t get elected and can’t shut up, Tweeted this:

Then former Representative and deadbeat dad, Joe Walsh chimed in:

And, of course, South Carolina’s own Lindsey Graham, who’s done nothing while in office but kvetch about Obama, added his two-cents — though I think he’s overcharging us — by saying:

Then, as if on cue, Rush Limbaugh set down his bottle of prescription meds to imply that this was all too coinky-dinky and so it must not be right:

“Isn’t it an amazing, timely coincidence here that they have found a militia leader of the Benghazi attack and they’ve arrested him? So I guess the video really wasn’t to blame. Because the guy that did the video is in jail, he’s who knows where anymore. Remember the video made these guys do it, so whoever did this really can’t be blamed. They were just incited by this video. But all of a sudden we’ve got the militia leader. But isn’t it fortunate that President Obama get a headline using the US military when he really needs one.”

Seriously GOP? The terror suspect was captured and you found a way to twist that into yet another scandal, another cover-up, another falsehood, in order to make the President look bad?

Stop already. And though I know none of you can stand Harry Reid, maybe take a page out of his book, just this once, and then go back to be the Party Of Loons, again:

"It doesn’t matter what your ideology is, you should feel good about this. There’s no conspiracy here, this is actual news. But the reaction of some of the Republicans, I’ve been told, is to downplay and insult the brave men and women of our special forces and the FBI….They’re insulting these good men and women who did some courageous things, heroic things, in order to criticize President Obama. I think they’ve lost touch with reality; it’s really pathetic, there’s no other word for it."

Think, as Reid suggests, about the men and women who captured Khattala, who risked their lives to do their jobs, and stop using this as another feeble attempt to attack the President.

Unless you like being the Asshat Party …

source

Sunday Funnies: Buh Bye Eric

Random Musings

A couple of weekends ago Carlos and I laid tile … and by that I mean we laid tile in the bathroom. Get your minds out of the gutter, people. I wish I had pictures to show, but our computer has decided to stop reading the camera’s picture card and until we buy a new computer — because we need one, not because of this picture snafu — I’ll have to hold off uploading personal pictures.

Anyway, we found some cool 16x16 gray tiles that look like burlap and I thought they’d go well with the man’s pinstriped suit look on the walls, but when it came time to create a pattern I was perplexed. I wanted to set  in even rows, very modern looking, but no matter how I measured we’d end up with small tile at the end of each row and that looked off to me. So, I tried a running bond pattern where the grout lines don’t match up, and this created small sections of tile at the opposite ends of alternating rows, and that was what we, er, I, er, we, picked.

And, for our first tile setting it went quite well. We borrowed a tile saw and, once we learned to run the tile through the saw in the proper direction, it all went rather smooth, though there were some hiccups, like explaining measurements to Carlos. Who knew I would be the Math Master when it came to measurements? Not me!

And so we cut tiles, and mortared the floor, and set tiles, and we were very nearly done when I took a look in the room and said, not so quietly, “F**k.”

The last row of tiles were not laid in a running bond pattern, but set in a regular square pattern, and I told Carlos we’d have to take them up and switch the sides — small tile to the left-side now, and then work backwards to get the running bond pattern.

Carlos, bless his heart, said, “No one will notice, it’s gonna be behind the toilet and under the sink pedestal."

I said, in my best Martha Stewart-Joan Crawford-Adolf Hitler voice, “I’ll notice.”

The tiles were switched. And it does look better. And soon, hopefully, there will be pictures.

A few new hot guys on The Tube this week, starting from the upper left and working clockwise.

Keegan-Michael Key, of USA’s Playing House. Not your classically handsome man, and quite adept at making the funny faces, but there’s something about him on that show that just tickles my funny boner.

Ian Anthony Dale from TNT’s Murder in the First. Smoldering, I say, smoldering. And, of course, with Taye Diggs as the star of the same show, the hotness quotient is quite high.

Last, Omari Hardwick from Starz’ new show, Power. He’s a drug lord trying to get out of the business and, well, he has the finest ass I think I’ve ever seen, and I saw quite a lot of it last Saturday night.

Just sayin’.

Another school shooting in Oregon last week and still we do nothing about gun control — not taking guns, but controlling who has them.

Good for us.

They’re saying the demise of the Tea Party has been greatly exaggerated after ‘Bagger candidate Dave Brat upset rightwingnut incumbent Eric Cantor.

Here’s my take: the Republicans in Virginia were sick and tired of Eric Cantor and just simply voted for the Other Guy. That doesn’t mean the Tea party is on the rise, it just means the Republicans in the state wanted Cantor gone.

We’ll have to see what happens come November, and hopefully the people of Virginia will send Dave Brat packing as well.

Still, it was a joy to see Cantor fall, thus becoming the highest-ranking Republican to lose renomination in one of the most stunning primary defeats in congressional history.

In other primary news, openly gay candidate for Governor of Maine, Mike Michaud is one step closer to becoming the nation's first governor to have been out at the time of his election.

Michaud will face incumbent GOP Governor Paul LePage in the general election and, as of now, the two are in a dead heat.

Fingers crossed.

In the Crazy Category: Mariah Carey made a personal appearance at the St. Regis Hotel in New York this week to announce the release of her new beverage.

Beverage? WTF? But, yeah, Mimi is getting into the beverage game with Butterfly, a carbonated beverage described as a “melodic beverage inspired by the magic of Mariah Carey.”

Side effects are that your boobs balloon up and you begin to wear sequinned dresses three sizes too small.

This made me smile.

When marriage quality became legal in Wisconsin, on the first day of same-sex wedding, police officers in Madison showed up at the courthouse with cakes for the newly married couples.

Gotta love that, eh?

And speaking of Wisconsin — nice segue, eh? — there’s this:

When Milwaukee resident, Christopher Graham and his partner, Andrew Capelle, heard that same-sex marriage was legal in Wisconsin, they hightailed it down to City Hall to make it legal. And., after the ceremony, the two men and some friends went to Transfer Pizzeria & Cafe to celebrate.

And the best part, other than finally being equal in America, was when the bill came and Graham and Capelle learned that the bill for their wedding dinner had been taken care of by the staff at the restaurant.

If I ever get to Milwaukee I know where I’m having pizza!

But, in other receipt news, there’s this:

Amira Gray says she went to Bistro 18, a Washington, DC hookah bar, in August of 2013 with some friends and, after receiving terrible service from the wait staff was shocked to see the name “Gay Bitches” on her receipt.

A friend showed the receipt to the manage, after a picture had been taken, of course, and the manager grabbed it away and returned with one missing the offensive language.

Still, I know where I won’t be going when I head back to DC.

In more crazy news, this is a new trend: short suits.

Fashion folks say it’s the way to beat the heat this summer, while I say it looks like what I wore to Easter services when I was six.

I’ll pass.

And since we began with a Carlos story, before we get to Tweet of the Week, let’s have one more.

Last Thursday Carlos had an appointment to have two wisdom teeth extracted; they had never bothered him before, but now, well, yeah. So, the week before he mentions his dentist appointment and when I ask what it’s for he says “pulling teeth.”

I immediately tell him I’ll take the day off from work and drive him, and he tells me it’ll be fine. I tell him he’s having wisdom teeth pulled and he will not feel like driving himself home, nor will he be able to; so he relented.

Cut to Thursday, I’m sitting in the reception room, waiting, reading In Cold Blood, and finally after about an hour, Carlos comes out. He seems perfectly fine; he says there is hardly any pain, even though he just had a local anesthetic.

Well, whatever. I drive him home and he takes a brief nap, after which he says he still feels fine, but could I make him a bowl of oatmeal. I do, and as he eats it, we are sitting in the living room and he’s trying to tell me, via clenched jaw, that it really doesn’t hurt and that he’ll be going in to work the next day.

I hold my hand up, and bring my fingers down in a ‘Don’t talk’ gesture.

He says, “I’m not supposed to talk after the extraction.”

I say, “You can talk, but you’re bugging me.”

My motto is, and always has been, make ‘em laugh, er, make me laugh.