Random Musings

It’s been a while since I’ve Randomly Mused — darn those pesky holidays — but I do have something to say, first and foremost about a show past its prime or relevance and about a hottie on that show …

Marshall Williams, an actor, model and contestant on Canadian Idol — and let’s not discuss the lack of relevance of America Idol — is joining the cast of Glee for its final … thank the goddess …season, playing Spencer, a foot ball star and stud and gay man.

But producers are quick to point out that Spencer is a “post-Glee gay — no one messes with him about his sexuality because he will kick their asses if they do.”

But do they mess around with him in, um, other ways?

Asking for a friend …

Speaking of gay, the oh-so-not-gay Congressman Aaron Schock Tweeted this vacation snapshot.

That’s all.

While watching the tube the other night an ad for Selma, the new picture about MLK and the Civil Rights Movement came on. I mentioned to Carlos that I wanted to see it and he said, “Selma? Selma Hayek?”

I said, “Yes, Selma Hayek, noted Civil Rights activist from the 1960s.”

Carlos gets a pass because he was not raised in this country and therefore never learned about Selma, but still, I almost choked from laughter.

Plus, it’s Salma Hayek, I reminded him.

Over there to England, Sir Elton John married David Furnish, his partner of 21 years, over the hols — that’s what they call holidays in Britain and I’m feeling a little Madonna so I’m’a fake a Brit accent, too.

But, sad to say, things need to change in the UK because had Sir Elton married a woman she would be Lady John, but David, as a an … gasp … is given no such title.

C’mon, England, make David a Sir.

Earlier this week, virulently homophobic former Virginia Governor Bob McDonnell was sentenced to two years in prison after being convicted of corruption. Wait? A corrupt politician? Say it ain’t so!

McDonnell, after being sentenced, addressed the court:

"I stand before you as a heartbroken and humbled man.”

Not so fast, you more of a busted man, a criminal man, but he also said he will dedicate the rest of his life “newly to service.”

Hopefully in the prison laundry.

No starch please.

Since marriage equality finally came to Florida, it wasn’t such a shock that Tampa Bay Times named Florida’s Attorney General Pam Bondi its "Loser Of 2014":

“It's hard to imagine how someone who won re-election so handily (rival George Sheldon could not afford a single TV ad) could emerge from 2014 more wounded and diminished as our Republican attorney general … Bondi's clumsy communication skills and relentless defense of Florida's gay marriage ban have made her a modern-day Anita Bryant. Antagonizing Florida's gay voters over same-sex marriage and Hispanic voters over immigration reform ensures Bondi has a bright political future ahead of her — if she moves to Mississippi.”

C’mon, don’t do that to Mississippi!

Wait, so David Furnish can’t be a ‘Sir’ but Joan Collins gets to be a ‘Dame’?

The diva of Dynasty was made the female equivalent of a knight in Queen Elizabeth II's annual New Year's honors list. She was recognized for her services to nonprofit groups helping children.

Sadly, right after the awards, Krystle Carrington appeared out of nowhere and shoved Joan into a pool.

More Carlos? M’kay.

He has the habit of not wanting to use the last of anything. He’s been known to ring a deodorant stick dry rather than open a new one; he’s been known to make dinner, and then dig out a piece of Tupperware to save … literally … a teaspoon of rice for the next day.

But this is about toilet paper. We recently had a houseguest at Casa Bob y Carlos and Carlos was cleaning the guest bathroom when he saw that the toilet paper in that bath was down to its last two or three sheets. He replaced the roll with a new one, but brought the nearly unused roll into the master bathroom for us … or me … to, er, polish off. Well, I decided to test Carlos and so I refused to use it and instead used a new roll.

That nearly-done roll sat in out bathroom for over a week until Carlos finally broke and used it. Then, he brought out the cardboard roll and tried to shove it down my shirt. I tossed it at him; he tossed it at me … we’re children, you know … and then I tossed it to the floor. H left it there and I said it would stay there, possibly to become a cat toy unless he picked it up.

Children, remember.

But then I had an idea. I took that toilet paper roll, which still had a single sheet dangling from it, and drew a face on it, with a tongue sticking out, and taped it to a piece of card stock and stuck it in the mailbox for Carlos to find when he returned from work.

That’s all, there’s no real point to the story except that, well, we’re children, and I am far more childish!

In a bit of crazy, Teabagging loon and Texas Congressman Louie Gohmert promised to be the engine of change that conservatives have been calling for in their rebellion against the establishment wing of the Republican Party and vowed to unseat John Boehner as Speaker of the House. 

If elected speaker, Louie Louie said he would “fight amnesty tooth and nail” because immigrants have no place in the Land of the Free, and that he would defund Obamacare so only the wealthy could afford healthcare, and he would, ahem, bring “positive solutions that will return power back to the people.”

And by people, he means rich white guys who hate women, the Gays, the immigrants and, well, anyone who isn’t rich white and male.

Sadly, Gohmert failed at his attempt, though, also sadly, we are stuck with Boehner for the next two years of a Do Nothing Congress.

Oy! What A Year We Had ...

Lots on my mind as we wind down another year …

I keep thinking about Leelah Alcorn, the transgender girl who killed herself because her parents told her she was wrong, and a sin, and an abomination … and that since God doesn’t make mistakes, she must have been mentally ill to think she as transgender.

Too bad they couldn’t have thought, “God doesn’t makes mistakes so She sent us a transgender child to open our eyes and the eyes of the world.” Maybe then Leelah wouldn’t have walked in front of that truck.

I think about all those LGBTQ kids who felt they could no longer go on this year because of being bullied by friend, fellow students, teachers and their own parents. Think of what any of those kids might have accomplished if we all just learned to accept people for who they are, and not what we think they should be.

My sister died this year … I remember one of the last times I talked with her, about a month or so before she passed. She didn’t seem to know who I was, didn’t even ask about Carlos — which she always did — and just talked about what was on the TV screen she was watching. I realized then that the sister I’d loved my whole life was leaving me. I realized then that things would never be the same.

I still called and still talked and made sure that, even if she didn’t quite understand, the last words she heard from me were, “I love you.”

I also realized then that when she did go, on February 15, she was in a much better place, and didn’t hurt, and had her hair, and was laughing with my Mom. It’s not a God thing, it’s a universe thing.

I’m a happily married man, to another happily married man. 

When I met Carlos I never thought this was a possibility … even after Massachusetts and Iowa … even after California. Then the tide started turning and we started talking about it; we both wanted to be married, we both wanted to have a husband. We wanted that. And then to have my Dad ask to be there, well, that was the icing on the wedding cake, with the added cherry of having marriage equality come to South Carolina … South FREAKING Carolina … after we got back from Washington.

Amazeballs.

We used to shop at Kroger until we learned that Kroger has a ‘Meh’ attitude about Open Carry in their stores; I’d always said that if the day came when I had to ask someone to move their assault weapon so I could get a loaf of bread, it was time to shop elsewhere.

So we did; we went back to Publix — where we shopped when we lived in Miami — and now Publix is in the news. But for a good reason: starting tomorrow, Publix stores will offer full benefits packages to their employees’ same-sex spouses.

Guns. Equality. I choose equality.

Of course, when you factor in that kid who shot his mother with her own gun in a Wal-Mart, Kroger should be prepared for that to happen in one of their stores.

Lotsa coming out parties this year, too, and lots of Coming Out Toaster Ovens and copies of The Gay Agenda—a one page pamphlet, actually, featuring one word: “equability”—being sent out from HOMO HQ.

Michael Martin took his boyfriend to prom and came out at the same time. Daniel Franzese, who played the  'almost to gay to function' in Mean Girls is now openly gay; as is Derrick Gordon, a sophomore starter for the University of Massachusetts men's basketball team; Ty Herndon and Billy Gilman, two country music stars … yes, country music … decided to live their lives as gay men out and proud. 

Nate Alfson, a high school, baseball and volleyball coach for a Catholic high school came out as gay and kept his job!

Chip Sarafin, an offensive lineman for the Arizona State football, came out, as did John Fennell, who represented Canada in the luge at the 2014 Winter Olympics in Sochi. 

British singer Sam Smith came out with the release of his debut album, In the Lonely Hour, saying the album “is about a guy that I fell in love with last year, and he didn’t love me back.” Tyler Glenn, the lead singer of Neon Trees and a Mormon, also came out; Mitch Eby, a Junior and defensive end for the Chapman University Football team, too.

Federico Díaz, Uruguayan actor and telenovela heartthrob, is now openly gay, along with high school swimming star, Jack Thorne, and Pete Cahall, principal of Washington DC’s Wilson High School who chose the school’s annual Pride Day event to finally tell his students that he is gay. Adam Joseph, Philadelphia meteorologist for 6ABC, announced the birth of his first child, publicly, acknowledged his partner of five years, Karl, and came out as gay.

Brad Thorson, a former college football player and former player for the Arizona Cardinals and Neal Baer, the executive producer and showrunner for CBS' 'Under the Dome' are out and proud; and after years of speculation, rumor, questions, guesses, dreams, Olympic swimmer Ian Thorpe came out as gay.

Kristian Nairn, an actor from Game of Thrones, came out, and so did Democratic Arizona State Senator Steve Gallardo, after listening to the arguments for that Arizona anti-LGBT, so-called religious freedom bill;  Matt Kaplon, student and baseball player for Drew University, came out to his team and the world last weekend after being inspired by the coming out story of NCAA basketball player Derek Schell; Brazilian diver, and Olympic hopeful, Ian Matos came out as gay, saying he was inspired by fellow diver Tom Daley’s coming out.

Djuan Trent, Miss Kentucky 2010, came out as lesbian on the heels of that federal judge ruling that Kentucky must recognize same-sex marriages from other states. Marcus Juhlin, a Swedish football player, is gay; so is actress Ellen Page and retired Premier League footballer Thomas Hitzlsperger.

Callan Chythlook-Sifsof, a U.S. snowboarder who missed the cut for Team USA, has come out as lesbian, and Michael Sam said he was gay, making him the first openly gay professional football player in this country.

We’ll be restocking the shelves with kitchen appliances and pamphlets as soon as possibly, because after last year we made need even more!

Politics. 

You cannot keep Obama down; even after that ridiculous 2104 mid-term election fiasco, he is not gonna  sit idly by and let the Republicans run roughshod over this country and try to turn back the clocks to the 1950s, when The Gays were in closets, and women couldn’t chose and racism was fun.

Gossip. I do so loves me some gossip. Paltrow? Loathe you, but you keep me in stitches with your shenanigans. 

Lohan actually made her stage debut and, while the reviews weren’t great, she wasn’t a major screw up … onstage. Off-stage she’s still Party Hardy Lohan. 

And Justin Bieber … I’ve made fun of your size … I’ve called you a talentless hack and a spoiled brat … I giggled when you wet yourself after getting arrested …, I found you obnoxious and ridiculous and just plain sad … That’s all.

Police shootings. And most of the victims are Black. Please try to tell me there isn’t a double standard when Michael Brown, a Black man, gets gunned down in the streets for allegedly stealing some cigars and Eric Garner, a Black man, gets choked to death for selling loose cigarettes, but Julia Shield, a White woman, strapped on armor and drove around a Chattanooga neighborhood shooting at people and police, and was just arrested. 

Explain to me the difference between John Crawford III, a Black man, holding a BB gun in a Wal-Mart and is shot to death by police, but two white men who go into a Wal-Mart, take BB guns off the shelves, load them and then start shooting are simply arrested.

There should be no difference, yet because there seems to be one, we have a lot to talk about in 2015.

It’s been a year of ups and downs, and highs and lows, but, for me, the ups and the highs outweigh the rest. I’m still here, still loved and in love, still Dad to some weird wild wacky pets. Still living in Small-town South Carolina. Okay … that might be a down.

I kid.

Tomorrow, we are off to the Round-The-Way-Gays, Neal and David’s, New Years Day, Newlyweds — three couples in our little group got married last year — and Not-So-Newly-Born Party. It’ll start 2015 just right!

Give. Thanks.

I first posted this back in Ott-Eight,  and decided to edit it a bit and repost it today, to kind of remind me of where I was then, what I thought then, and what I wanted out of life; the more things change the more they stay the same.

Not to brag, but I've been told that I am an extremely polite person. I was raised on Please and Thank You, Yes Ma'am, No Sir, and I still act that way today.

True story: I was selected for jury duty back when we lived in Miami and when they were questioning us in the courtroom, it was my turn to stand. Well, it was a narrow aisle, so I put my hands behind my back, and as the judge and the lawyers began to ask their questions, I always answered Yes sir, No Sir.

The judge stopped for a second and smiled. "Are you in the military?" he asked.

"No, sir" I said. "I was raised by a military man and a Southern woman."

True story: A few years before that, while living in California, I was in a grocery store buying a birthday cake for a co-worker. I asked if I may please order a cake. May I please have a name iced onto it? I pleased and thank you'd my way through the ordering process and finally the girl left to go in the back and finish my order. But then, just before disappearing to that back room, she turned around and said to me, "I think you are the most polite person I've ever waited on."

I smiled and said, "Could you just shut up and ice my damn cake!"

When all else fails slip into sarcasm. That's my motto. But I digress.

Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday, probably because there are no gifts involved, except for the gift of time; time spent with loved ones and friends; the gift of thanks. This is a day of thanks for Americans; a truly American holiday, like 4th of July, but one we celebrate not with picnics and beer, firecrackers and sparklers, but with a meal we share with loved ones, friends and family.

I have so much to be thankful for this year.

Yes, the usual family and friends and health and happiness, blah blah blah, everyone says that. But I am also thankful that we are an America on the verge of a new day, when we are all, even those of us under the LGBT balloon, considered more equal than we have been in the past.

Fourteen years ago, Carlos and I couldn’t be legally married anywhere in this country, and here we are now, married, legally, in South Carolina and 34 other states and the District of Columbia. I never saw that coming, but I am so thankful for that.

I am thankful for the years I had with my sister — and missing her every single day — because of the things she taught me, and continues to teach me. I am thankful that I could see her, and feel her, alongside my Mom as Carlos and I stood in a courtroom and said, “I do.” I could feel all that love, and for that I am always thankful.

I am grateful to her four daughters, all of whom she raised so well that when Carlos and I told them we were getting married, they all responded, “Now he really is our Uncle.”

I am thankful for my Dad. He didn’t ask for a gay son, but he got one; he didn’t know what to do with a gay son, but he did the best he could. And, when the time came to marry Carlos, and we decided to go west to Washington to do it, it made my Dad’s day. I think he was more excited than we were, more proud that we were doing it. I wish every gay person could have a Dad like mine, who sees that change is good, and sees that not everyone is the same — even in your own family — but who loves you all just the same.

I am thankful for cold mornings and blue skies.

I am thankful for small dogs and cats because, well, I'm bigger than them and I will always beat them. Just channeling Joan Crawford and Christina at the pool.

I am thankful for......Carlos. There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t think about how lucky I am to have him; even the days when he makes me insane …. More insane? … I realize I’d rather be driven nuts by him than not to have him at all. I am thankful for the smirk he gives me; I am thankful for the look of horror on his face when I bust out in a showtune; I am just plain thankful. I don’t know where I’d be, or who I’d be, if I hadn’t met him all those years ago.

I am thankful to my Mom, especially today. Thanksgiving was always her holiday; cooking for her family was my mother’s greatest joy and a great gift to all of us. I am thankful that I can keep that tradition alive, and can see my Mom in that.

I am thankful for leaves changing color and drifting to the ground on a breeze.

I am thankful for music and pets and soft blankets and breathing and speaking, and having a voice when I speak.

I am thankful for thinking being feeling loving living.

For Life.

And all it encompasses.

To Life.

Thanks.

UPDATE: It's Marriage Equality, Y'all!

It’s a great day in South Carolina.

Barring a stay, or emergency order, from the Supreme Court of the United States, marriage equality has come to the state; twice! A pair of rulings released yesterday by two different federal courts have basically dismantled South Carolina's constitutional ban on same-sex marriage clearing the way for the state to become the 34th state — and the first in the deep South — to legalize marriage equality.

And it all happened so quickly; yesterday afternoon I was not married in South Carolina, and then shortly after dinner I was, when the 4th Circuit Court of Appeals ruled against South Carolina Attorney General Alan Wilson’s request for an emergency stay on last week’s court ruling that declared the state's ban on same-sex marriage was unconstitutional; the unanimous three-judge ruling said:

"Upon consideration of submissions relative to appellant's motion for stay pending appeal, the court denies the motion and denies the alternate request for a temporary stay."

And that simply means that, starting tomorrow at noon, same-sex marriages in South Carolina can proceed.

Still, Alan Wilson, obviously stomping his feet and twisting his head around in circles, has vowed to fight on; he  says the laws were voted on by the people of South Carolina in 2006 and that a court shouldn't overturn what the people chose.

Ah, Alan, but they did; in South Carolina and elsewhere, because, something you might have learned in law school you don’t let the majority vote on the rights of the minority. We did not let racist white America vote on the Civil Rights of black Americans; we did not let America vote on interracial marriage; we did not let America vote on the rights of women to vote; we should never have allowed Americans to vote of the marriage rights of gay Americans.

Pretty simple. Still, Alan Wilson released a statement after the ruling saying the issue has not been resolved nationally:

"It is still likely the U.S. Supreme Court will address conflicting rulings between federal circuit courts of appeal. Therefore, today's ruling by the Fourth Circuit does not end the constitutional obligation of this Office to defend South Carolina law. We continue to believe the doctrine of federalism and the Tenth Amendment should allow South Carolina's unique laws to be considered at the highest appropriate court of appeal. We will be seeking an application to the U.S. Supreme Court for a stay shortly.”

Of course the ruling has not been resolved nationally, though it will, and sooner rather than later, but the issue has been resolved in this state, by the 4thy Circuit Court — twice — and by two separate federal judges.

Alan, honey, build a bridge and get over it. And take Governor Haley with you; she also released a statement saying she has a "responsibility to defend the Constitution of South Carolina and supports the Attorney General."

You mean the Constitution that treats some South Carolinians as second class citizens? That Constitution, Governor? Sit down.

And stay seated because right after the 4th Circuit told Alan Wilson to stop talking, Judge Michelle Childs — presiding over the case of Bradacs v South Carolina, the case for which The Will of the People Fund was created — ruled  that the marriage of Katie Bradacs and her wife, Tracie Goodwin-Bradacs — and all other same-sex couples in South Carolina who married elsewhere — should be recognized in the state because the constitutional ban "impermissibly violate [the] Plaintiffs' fundamental right to have their marriage recognized."

"We believed when we filed this case nearly two years ago that we were right, and Judge Childs agreed with us. It is such a great day for us and our family. It is a great day in South Carolina for marriage equality! Our family unit is complete!"—Tracie Goodwin-Bradacs

It is a great day for South Carolina.

sources:

MSNBC

Salon

WIS

How Would You Like Your Marriage Voided?

I know firsthand what a feeling it was to go from being “partnered’ to being married; it’s really a subtle difference, maybe a change in speech — This is my husband versus This is my partner — but it felt huge.

Now, imagine that you’ve married your partner, girlfriend, boyfriend, significant other, and you’re feeling that joy, that sense of newness, that sense of equality, only to have the rug yanked out from under when a Circuit Court decides that marriages bans against the gays are just fine.

That’s what happened when the 6th Circuit Court recently ruled that marriage bans are legal and, somehow, just. And since that ruling the state of Michigan is trying to declare that the 300 same-sex couples who received licenses last March, and were subsequently legally married in the state, are now no longer husband-and-husband or wife-and-wife.

How’s that for equality?

The weddings were performed by county clerks March 22, a day after U.S. District Judge Bernard Friedman struck down Michigan's same-sex marriage ban; that same day the 6th Circuit Court of Appeals in Cincinnati issued a stay on those marriages, but it came after those 300 couples had legally completed the steps to be married.

Now, Michigan Governor, and ISBL Asshat winner, Rick Snyder would like those marriages voided since the 6th Circuit Court of Appeals upheld Michigan's ban on same-sex marriage, along with bans in Ohio, Kentucky and Tennessee.

You can’t get married; you can get married; now your marriage is void. It never existed. You don’t exist as a married couple. Ain’t that America?

Lawyers for the governor, and for the state of Michigan, are saying that "from a legal standpoint, because the marriages rested solely on the district court's erroneous decision, which has now been reversed, it is as if the marriages never existed.”

I mean, bad enough that we are being treated like second-class citizens; bad enough that we are expected to do as everyone else in this country is supposed to do, work, pay taxes, be responsible citizens, vote, and yet we do not have the same rights as those other citizens; bad enough. But to allow us the opportunity to get married when the law is changed, and then to change it back and sue to have our marriages declared void?

That is not America; that cannot happen. These cases need to go before the Supreme Court and have marriage equality declared the law of land everywhere in this country.

Case closed.

Appeals ruling voids300 gay marriages, Michigan argues

South Carolina Marriage Equality: Where We Stand

So, we had kind of a big day here in South Carolina yesterday after Judge Richard Gergel, a US District Court judge, struck down the state’s same-sex marriage ban saying it violates the U.S. Constitution. Gergel did, however, issue a stay on his order until noon on November 20th, allowing for an appeal, and until that time no marriage licenses can be issued.

So, the dust is settling, but while we all celebrated the news, the story is far from over.

As expected, before the ink was dry on Gergel’s ruling, South Carolina’s Attorney General Alan Wilson said he will appeal the ruling to the U.S. Fourth Circuit Court. And that’s good, because the Fourth Circuit Court has already ruled that marriage bans are unconstitutional, and that ruling applies to Virginia, West Virginia, and North Carolina — who chose not to fight the ruling — and to Maryland, where marriage equality is already legal; only rabid dog Alan Wilson, is still fighting.

"Today's ruling comes as no surprise and does not change the constitutional obligation of this Office to defend South Carolina law, including, but not necessarily limited to, appeal to the Fourth Circuit." — Alan Wilson

This case was brought by SC Equality and Lambda Legal after Colleen Condon and her partner, Nichols Bleckley, applied for a marriage license in Charleston; a local probate court judge agreed to receive the couple's application and filings from other gay couples, and another judge, this one in Columbia, also began issuing licenses for same-sex couples.

But Wilson disagreed, and filed a motion that same day asking the South Carolina Supreme Court to stop the licenses from being issued, which it did the next day. That court said a separate decision being heard by the US District Court in South Carolina must be heard first before the state's ban could be tossed out.

And that case involves Katie Bradacs and her wife, Tracie Goodwin-Bradacs — and is the case for which The Will of the People Fund was created — who were married in 2012 in Washington DC and are suing to have their marriage recognized in this state. U.S. District Judge Michelle Childs is still considering that case and a ruling is expected soon.

But Gergel's ruling states that South Carolina’s law infringes on the US Constitution's due process and equal protection clause, and his order stops Wilson and any other law enforcement body in the state from enforcing the current ban.

"This court has carefully reviewed the language of South Carolina's constitutional and statutory ban on same sex marriage and now finds that there is no meaningful distinction between the existing South Carolina provisions and those of Virginia declared unconstitutional. The Court finds that [the Virginia decision] controls the disposition of the issues before this court and establishes, without question, the right of Plantiffs to marry as same-sex partners. The arguments of Defendent Wilson simply attempt to relitigate matters already addressed and resolved in [the Virginia decision.]”  — Richard Gergel

And that’s where Wilson is looking more and more like a fool. He seeks to appeal Gergel’s ruling to the Fourth Circuit Court which has already ruled, by virtue of its decision in Bostic v Virginia, that South Carolina’s marriage ban — and, really, all marriage bans are unconstitutional; Wilson maintains that South Carolina's law is unique:

"Our state's laws on marriage are not identical to those in other states. Therefore, based on the time-honored tradition of federalism, this Office believes South Carolina's unique laws should have their day in court at the highest appropriate level."

That’s not actually true; the ban in our state is exactly like bans in other states — notably North Carolina — where the people voted to amend the state Constitution to ban same-sex marriage, and where the ruling by the Fourth Circuit Court has already struck those laws down. Wilson stands in direct contrast to attorneys general in both North Carolina and West Virginia, who refused to defend their own states' bans following the Fourth Circuit ruling.

Alan Wilson is just a dog with a bone; and a hard-on for keeping gay couples as second class citizens in South Carolina. But, as we’ve seen in rulings by both the Fourth Circuit Court and the US Supreme Court — which just ruled that the stay on same-sex marriages is Kansas is over — Wilson will end up being swatted on the nose by the US Constitution.

Bad dog ... or, as Tuxedo says:

Judge Strikes Down SC Same-Sex Marriage Ban

Yep, Alan Wilson Is Still Defending The Gay Marriage Ban
SC Attorney General To Appeal Same-Sex Marriage Ruling

What's Up With Marriage Equality In South Carolina?

It was almost a month ago that the Fourth U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals struck down Virginia’s same-sex marriage ban; and it’s been just a few weeks since other states in that court’s jurisdiction have complied with the ruling, with both West Virginia and North Carolina deciding to let equality stand.

But one state refuses to budge and, well, any guesses which one it is? If you said South Carolina, order some grits and take a seat, you win.

Here’s what’s happening in South Carolina, where it’s not the heat it’s the stupidity.

In Columbia Federal Court, we are awaiting movement on the case of Bradacs v Nikki Haley and Alan Wilson, et al. This is the case for which The Will of the People Fund — on which Carlos and I are board members — was created.

The case is simple: South Carolina Highway Patrol Trooper Katherine Bradacs and her wife, US Air Force retiree Tracie Goodwin-Bradacs want South Carolina to recognize their legal marriage that was performed in Washington DC back in 2012.

Attorney General Alan Wilson said in a filing last month that the couple is suing the wrong people in the wrong court. He argued marriage is an issue for the state courts and that he and Governor Haley, the named defendants, lack the enforcement power over the state’s same-sex marriage ban.

But in a response this week, Carrie Warner and John Nichols, attorneys for the Bradacs, renewed their request that Judge Michelle Childs rule in their favor without a trial. They argued that federal suits are allowed against state officers who enforce unconstitutional laws and since the governor and attorney general are required to enforce the state constitution, they are the proper defendants.

And, down in Charleston, Colleen Condon and Nichols Bleckley applied for a same-sex marriage license last month and are asking that U.S. District Judge Richard Gergel issue a preliminary injunction preventing the state from enforcing its ban, effectively opening the way for same-sex marriages.

In a response to that case filed this past Monday, Attorney General Alan Wilson said he opposes the request and argues that “because this case seeks to decide the core question of two people’s marital status, it belongs in state court rather than federal court.” He also argues that the Charleston court should put a hold on the case until a decision in the Columbia case which is farther along in the legal process, or, in the case that Gergel issues a preliminary injunction, the injunction be put on hold until the state can appeal to the Fourth U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals.

The same court, by the way, that has already ruled same-sex marriage bans are unconstitutional.

In addition, the American Civil Liberties Union [ACLU] and South Carolina Equity are suing South Carolina’s Department of Motor Vehicles in federal court in Greenville on behalf of three people who had same-sex marriages in other states and changed their surnames. The suit alleges that DMV officials refused to allow them to use the names on their licenses.

There’s the update, but let’s break it down very simply: say that Judge Childs rules favorably in the case of Bradacs v Haley, Wilson, et al, which she’ll have to do because a ruling from a higher court has already been given. Well, then Nikki Haley and her Little Lap Dog Alana Wilson will file an appeal and take their case to the Fourth U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals, who will, and I’ll put this in laymen’s terms and avoid the legalese, look at Haley and say, “Bitch, please! You’re wasting time and tax dollars. This case was decided in October. Take your hate, put it on a shelf and move on."

Undoubtedly, though, Nikki Haley who doesn’t understand when she is wrong — something she is most of the time — will them have Toto, er, Wilson, file an appeal to the US Supreme court and they will say, “Bitch please! We said we would let the Fourth U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals ruling stand. You have no case. Go home.”

And then she might, after having wasted time she could have spent on governing the state, and tax payer dollars that could have gone to something more important t than the fight against equality.

I said this the other day, but I’ll say it again; back in the 1960s Alabama Governor George Wallace blocked a schoolhouse door to keep Black children from entering the schools. That is his legacy, being on the wrong side of the Civil Rights movement and literally standing in the way of equality.

By comparison, Nikki Haley is figuratively barring the door to marriage for same-sex couples in South Carolina, and that will be her legacy; she will be remembered for a few things, but one of the most prominent will be her fight against marriage equality even after the battle for equality has been won.

It’s time to step aside, Governor Haley; you’ve lost.

Build a bridge … and get over it.