The Turtle is a Liar

Two things I will not abide by: lying, dumbass politicians and zucchini bread. Guess which one is on my mind today?

Y’all remember back in Ott-Eight when Barack Obama kicked John McCain’s* ass to the curb? I still feel warm and tingly thinking about that. I also feel warm and tingly when I think what The Turtle, AKA Kentucky Senator Mitch McConnell, said at the time … and I’ll paraphrase:

“Our one job is to make sure Barack Obama is a one-term president.”

He said it, I didn’t. And what’s worse than saying it is that he and the rest of his Angry Rich White Men Only Party, couldn’t even do that; Obama kicked GOP ass again in 2012, so The Turtle was wrong about that, though he was right about one thing: the GOP had one job during Obama’s first term and they would do, and did do, absolutely nothing else.

Unless you count the fifty-some-odd attempts to repeal the Affordable Healthcare Act, which they couldn’t even do. Unless you count the government shutdown, for which We The People are now paying some $24 billion.

So, Mitch and his cronies did absolutely nothing for six years and yet, and it still boggles my mind, a lot of you voted them into power and even re-elected the dumbasses who sat on their cushy fat asses — when they weren’t on vacation — and did absolutely nothing. And now The Turtle is back to his old tricks of saying things that are untrue … okay, they’re outright lies …

Mitch McConnell is trying to rewrite his history of obstruction and failure by taking credit for the economic growth that has occurred under President Obama by saying this on the Senate floor:

“After so many years of sluggish growth, we’re finally starting to see some economic data that can provide a glimmer of hope. The uptick appears to coincide with the biggest political change of the Obama administration’s long tenure in Washington: The expectation of a new republican congress.”

Wait. What? All of this happened the Wednesday after the election last November? We suddenly went from Bad to better in the space of about twelve hours?

Siddown Mitch, your stupid is showing.

The facts are that the economy gained over 11 million jobs in spite of Mitch McConnell and his Angry Rich White Men Only Party’s efforts to keep the recession going; or does Mitchy expect anyone to really believe that the economy started improving back in 2011 because we knew the GOP would take control of Congress in 2014?

Mitch? Pull your head back inside your shell, your stupid is showing.

The GOP has done nothing in the last six years and with nothing to show for their hefty paychecks, free healthcare, paid vacations, they need to so-opt Obama’s victories and try to play them off as they own; but they can’t … except to those dumbasses who checked off the GOP box last November, and voted for a party that has done nothing for them — unless they’re rich and white and male — for far too long.

I could go on, but I’ll let DNC Communications Director Mo Elleithee respond to Mitch McConnell’s lunacy:

“Hahahahahahahahahahaha. That Mitch McConnell is one funny guy. He likes to remind people all the time that he’s not a scientist. Now we know he’s not a mathematician or an economist either. The fact is, under President Obama we’ve had 57 straight months of private sector job growth leading to nearly 11 million jobs added. All Republicans have given us is a government shutdown that cost the economy $24 billion. I get why he wants to take credit for the economic recovery. But maybe he should first do something to help contribute to it.”

Siddown Mitch, before someone turns you on your back and you can’t get up again.

Hmmmmmmm ….

*Correction, thanks to Anonymous
via PoliticusUSA

The GOP: Insane. Lazy. Lying. Anti-LGBT.

Okay, so we know the GOP hates … hates … President Obama. I mean, back in 2009, when the man had barely been in office a hot minute, the Grand Old Turtle of the GOP, Mitch McConnell, popped his head outta his shell and said the Republican’s sole job over the next four years would be to make sure Obama was a one-term President; and we all know how that worked out.

And then this past election cycle they campaigned on anti-Obama sentiment and not on what they had been doing for the country the last four years … uh, because that’s a big fat nothing. They have done nothing and yet because they were able to make it all seem to be Obama’s fault, they took control of Congress; for doing nothing.

Still, they hate him; they hate him so much they’ve lost their mother-effing minds, and are now trying to systematically dismantle the office of the President, or at least the President’s powers. That is, until a rich old white guy gets back into office and then everything will be turned back around.

Until then, listen to this: last week, the GOP goose-stepping asshatted Congressman from Georgia, Paul Broun called on Weeper, er, Speaker of the House John Boehner to not invite Obama to deliver the State of the Union address next year.

Uh, yeah.

But, not to be outdone by his feeble-minded party cohort, Tim Huelskamp, the goose-stepping asshatted Congressman from Kansas, suggested that the budgets for White House operations, including the President’s use of Air Force One, be decreased. Of course, Huelskamp is also a fan of not inviting Obama to give his State of the Union address because, well, George Washington never gave one in person; he had it delivered to Congress.

I know.

Then, not to be outshone in the asshat department, Texas’ newly-elected GOP goose-stepping asshatted governor, Greg Abbott, announced this week that he plans to sue Obama on behalf of his state. That’s job one on Abbott’s first day in office; not jobs, not the budget, not environment ... but suing the president because, well, you know.

Insane, I know, but there’s more; let’s talk about the bigoted, and homophobic and anti-LGBT GOP.

The House Rules Committee of the 113th Congress — nine Republicans and four Democrats — is the group that decides which bills make it to the House floor for a vote, and last week, by a 7-3 vote, the committee killed ENDA.

And those seven committee members, elected by us — well, by some of us — to work for us, and to do the things we want them to do, killed ENDA even though 73% of Americans support the idea that firing someone just because they’re an L, G,B, or T is not right.

Three-quarters of We the People wanted this law passed and seven Republicans said No. And those seven bigots are down there, left to right, top to bottom, meet Reps. Michael Burgess, Pete Sessions, Tom Cole, Virginia Foxx, Richard Nugent, Daniel Webster, and Rob Woodall.

That’s you GOP folks; and that’s your Congress for the next two years. They have put forward no plans for anything other than trying to hurt the president, other than trying to hurt the LGBT community, other than stomping their feet and suggesting another government shutdown over Obama’s immigration plan.

Yes, another $24,000,000,000 shutdown that We the People will pay for because the GOP, and its Teabagger minions, don’t like a Black man in a White House.

How’s that for hate?

Republicans Suggest Obama Be Denied Use of Air Force One

Seven Republicans Kill LGBT Bill Supported By 70% of Americans

Well, Isn't That Convenient?

For over two years we’ve listened to the GOP squawk about Benghazi like a gaggle of parrots demanding a cracker, and now this? For two years the GOP has used Benghazi as a wedge to divide this country, to run their campaigns on, to denigrate the President and the Secretary of State, and now this? For two years, every time something good happened in this country — like better jobs numbers, lower unemployment, a rising stock market, a healthy economy — the GOP began shrieking Benghazi! Benghazi! Benghazi! and now this?

The Republicans have spent untold amounts of money investigating Benghazi, and then investigating the investigation into Benghazi, and then denying the outcome of each and every investigation when it didn’t jibe with their viewpoint that it’s all some conspiracy being manipulated by the illegal immigrant in the White House, and now this?

Now that the Midterm Elections are over, the House Intelligence Committee — and I won’t make a joke about that — has wrapped up its Benghazi investigation and released their shocking report just moments before the GOP scurried home for their Thanksgiving Day break. And what does it show?

Did it show that the White House sat on intelligence that could have prevented the attack, something the GOP has muttered all along? No, it did not. Did it show that Hillary Clinton's State Department bungled the response to the initial protests in Cairo, which resulted in the attack and the deaths? No, it did not. Did it show, as the GOP has been saying it would for over twenty-four months, that the CIA bungled the military response to the attacks? No, it did not.

It shows the White House and the State Department and the CIA did absolutely nothing wrong, something we have known all along. But the GOP kept on until the midterm elections were safely past and until after Obama’s immigration speech so it would be basically ignored. And now, suddenly, after two years of everyone in the GOP calling the President and the Secretary of State and the CIA a bunch of liars, we’ve learned that the GOP was … wait for it … wrong. Again.

It's not that the committee found nothing to criticize because they did; the State Department facility in Benghazi had inadequate security, and some of the early intelligence after the attacks was inaccurate, and maybe the CIA should have given more weight to eyewitnesses on the ground. But those criticisms were fully acknowledged by the first investigations.

The GOP was wrong, and they basically knew it after the first investigation but they kept at it like a dog with a bone.  There is no scandal — except for the one every Thursday night at (PM, EST — and there never was, but one Republican, who I tend to see of as more like a rabid closeted homosexual dog with a bone, will not accept the findings of his own party, or of any investigation into Benghazi because he says he knows better.

South Carolina’s own Good Old Boy, Lindsey “I am not a Homosexual” Graham has refused … refused I say, refused … to accept that the new House Benghazi report that has cleared both Obama and Hillary Clinton of any wrongdoing in its response to the Benghazi attack.

"I think the report is full of crap."

Graham foot-stomped and head-snapped all over TV this past weekend, insisting that members of the Obama administration altered the Benghazi talking points after the attack.

"I'm saying that anybody who has followed Benghazi at all knows that the CIA deputy director did not come forward to tell Congress what role he played in changing the talking points and the only way we knew he was involved is when he told a representative at the White House, I'm going to do a hard review of this, a hard rewrite."

When CNN host Gloria Borger told Graham, again, that the House report concludes that the administration received bad information at first and did not lie, he hissed:

"That's a bunch of garbage. That's a complete bunch of garbage."

Hell hath no fury like Miss Lindsey scorned, especially when she was hoping to use Benghazi as a weapon if she decides to run against Hillary Clinton for the presidency in 2016.

Someone get the smelling salts.

ForwardProgressives

MotherJones
TalkingPointsMemo

I Love Dick

Y’all can have Rhianna and Katy and Madge and Brit and Gaga — wait, is she still relevant or has it been fifteen minutes — but my gay icon is … wait for it … it’s unexpected … it’s not who you think … District Court Judge Richard Young.

Swoon.

See, Dick, as I like to think of him — and, No, not in that way — is the judge who struck down Indiana's same-sex marriage ban back in June. And yesterday he ruled in the case of Bowling v Pence, the state's last unresolved marriage equality lawsuit, and found in favor of the defendants, which now requires Indiana to recognize out-of-state marriages same-sex marriages.

Swoon.

Now, since Dick had already ruled on this once, his latest ruling came as no real surprise, but it’s what he said, and to whom he said it, that makes him swoon-worthy. He basically called Indiana Governor, and ISBL Asshat of the Week award winner, Mike Pence a big fat liar by saying that the governor's statements to the court were "bold misrepresentations" and then reinstating Pence as a defendant in the case as it moves ahead on appeal. 

See, last year Pence filed a motion to be removed as a defendant in the lawsuit because, he said, he had no authority to enforce the state’s ban on same-sex marriage and, based on that representation, the court agreed. But, when Dick, er, Judge Young, struck down Indiana’s marriage ban, Pence’s general consul began sending memos to all executive branch agencies directing them on how they were to proceed. 

Wait, what? Pence says he has no authority over the issue, but then when the case goes the way he doesn’t want it to, suddenly he’s all up in that business? Well, Dick wasn’t playing:

"...the Governor did what he claimed he could not do by directing executive agencies on how to proceed in enforcing the law."

That's judicial-speak for: Mike Pence is a big fat liar.

Swoon.

I love you Dick, er, Judge Young.

via NCRM

Ted Nugent Is A Pig

Google it, you’ll see.

He’s a man who has said hateful, racist and threatening things about the President; he’s a man who sh*t so he wouldn’t have to go to Vietnam; he’s a man who married a teenage girl — of whom he was the legal guardian — so he could have sex with her; he’s a man who called for the execution of Democrats and the President of the United States; a man who has made racist comment after racist comment.

I don’t know why anyone would want to hear him perform, much less open his yap to speak, but apparently a group of Idaho Native Americans hired him to give a concert at the Coeur D’Alene Casino but then cancelled after doing one of those quick Google searches and finding out just who Nugent is; a man who doesn’t take well to people cancelling his paycheck because he’s a liar and a racist and an asshat; a man who said this, about Native Americans, after his show was cancelled:

“I take it as a badge of honor that such unclean vermin are upset by me and my positive energy. By all indicators, I don’t think they actually qualify as people, but there has always been a lunatic fringe of hateful, rotten, dishonest people that hate happy, successful people.”

Don’t qualify as people; the original inhabitants of this country don’t qualify as people?

But what shows the irony and the hypocrisy of Ted Nugent is that he was more than willing to take money from the so-called “vermin” and cash their check, but as soon as they heard all the hateful things he’s said, and told him to stay home, suddenly he’s very clearly against them in every possible way.

Of course, isn’t the first time Nugent has been stopped from performing in concert. Earlier this year, a town in Texas actually paid him $16,000 not to perform after they learned what a horrible, hate-filled, lying, draft-dodging, pants-crapping, child-f**king Teabagging, violet asshat he is; and I think that town in Texas feels that the 16K was money well-spent.

And I imagine that now that Nugent has spewed his filth about the Native American population in the country, he’ll be losing more venues and more concerts.

Win.Win.

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